Who Am I

I am Shawna. I am Mom to Ryan (27), Brittany (25), Baby Drake in Heaven (Forever an infant), and Twins Jacob and Brandon (12). I am Nana to Ricky (5), Braylyn (3), Payton (2) and Kacen (cooking in the oven) as of this writing. But there are a ton of birthdays on the way! Haha.

I have four cats. I love Smokey. He is an emotional support cat, not by training, but by personality. Max is the Momma cat, not by blood, but again, by personality. We rescued Peppers, I hate him because he is kind of annoying, but he loves me so I tolerate him. We also rescued Lucky who I ADORE. She is my favorite. I don’t know why, because when she first got here she bit the shit out of me for the first week. She avoided me for the first month, and only recently tolerates me. But I LOVE that freaking cat Haha. Go figure.

I am 45 years old. I have Bipolar Disorder, OCD, Severe Anxiety. I suffer from Chronic Migraines, Psoriatic Arthritis, Obesity, Issues with the arteries in my heart. I believe that I have undiagnosed Autism, but I refuse to investigate into that (My twin boys also suffer from Autism, Mood Disorders, OCD, and Anxiety making me wonder if I have a touch of the Autism bug too). I was sexually molested as a child and as an adult. I watched my Mom suffer from physical abuse during my childhood, and I got abused as an adult. The vicious cycle right?

In my 20’s I abused drugs and alcohol and was addicted to both. Coke was my choice of drug. Jack Daniel’s was my drink. As a young adult I got a drunk driving, A REALLY drunk driving and after that night I BEGGED God to change my life and He did.

Fast forward to today, I am VERY thankful for my God and all that he has done for me and I am very spiritual. I try to get to church as often as I can but because I don’t have a car right now, it is not every week that I get to go. I wish I could because it makes me feel so good.

Today I am feeling aggravated because I am dieting. I am hungry and therefore cranky. Today I just want to lay in bed and nap. But I have to adult today therefore I will be closing this introduction to me and go back about my day. My next post will be an introduction into my mental illness, I mean in all honestly that is the most interesting part of me anyway!

Until next time.